I’m stuck at home with a suspected case of bacterial Laryngitis with Xan. It makes for a lot of whispers and some pretty ghostly laughs inspired by an array of tv shows and movies. Fun, right? But I figured I would take the time to catch up with things that I’ve wanted to get done around the house, including the blog.
I tried going to sleep last night early, but quickly realized it wasn’t going to happen. I decided I would buy a new audio book from iTunes and let it distract me to sleep. After rejecting a dozen of a dozen books, I went on an impulse and bought a different kind of book. A self-help book. I know, right? But, it was half the price as most of the competition. It’s entitled Women with Attention Deficit Order. Listening, I got a desire to write about my learning disablity. Not the first time. But, I’ve hesitated in the past because I didn’t want people to think I throw it out there to get sympathy or to excuse my actions. But I want to write about it because it is such a huge part of who I am and why I do and often say unconventional things. I often wish I could simply explain my “unique” traits to people through my blog, then I would feel less stupid in social settings because they would know why I often say silly things like replacing the word “internet” for “freeway.” (The more recent habitual word switch.)
But maybe, just maybe, I can also reach out to those who are like me. Who struggle with ADHD with or without the dyslexia. Who struggle with feelings of isolation, constantly worrying about what is coming out of my mouth that I’m not hearing or meaning to say. Who struggle to figure out how people stay caught up with even the most simplest tasks like putting your keys in the same place every time. Who struggle in more ways than this paragraph can adequately express.
I understand, accept, and use the term ‘learning disability.’ Offically, I was diagnosed half way through college with major ADHD (a 7 on a scale of 10 being off the deep end) and a reading disorder from BYU. The person who tested me told me that BYU only diagnose children with dyslexia and call it a reading disorder when dealing with adults. I simplify life and just call it dyslexia, since it deals with so much more than just reading.
I don’t consider myself to be disabled, though. Yes, I still carry some negative feelings from my oblivious days. All those years of not understanding why I didn’t learn like everyone else and why my intelligence always seemed impossible to see through my constant verbal slips. These are gradually dissipating as I understand myself better. No, I consider ADHD to be a personality type, only one that may need more attention than others. I think it should be considered alongside Red, Blue, White, and Yellow in the Hartman Personality Profile. I’ve impulsively chosen the color green. It just came to me. But it fits. Just like reds can be obnoxiously controlling, bossy, and overly OCD sometimes, Greens can be unorganized, unstructured, and very forgetful.
Is it scientific or accurate? Not in the slightest! But consider it my way of coping or dealing.
Welcome to the world of my green personality!
- Essential Facts about ADHD Predominantly Inattentive (brighthub.com)
- Are we medicating a disorder or treating boyhood as a disease? (theglobeandmail.com)
- Ten Essential Attention Deficit Disorder Facts (brighthub.com)
- October is Learning Disabilities Month (firstbook.org)